mayb i am upset. mayb i am sore. but i sincerely dislike the idea of me going to kdu. i don't have anything against it. maybe just a few preconceived ideas. but hell, i do hate the place. i haven't got a friend other than those i met during orientation, but even so, they're in different courses. those who go to a levels science, make me feel stupid as hell. i don't know anyone in a levels arts. flux man.

i am unhappy.

somehow it's gonna be difficult to imagine not being in your arms again. i don't even want to think about it.

the past 4 days that we've spent together with our friends during our trip was great. just being able to be with you, to see you everyday for the last 96 plus hours were absolutely perfect. i miss those times already. it was lovely, having you to tuck me in bed, to kiss me goodnite, to stroke my hair just before i sleep, to have someone to cuddle and snuggle with before we fall asleep. to have someone to watch out for me during the trip.

to watch you worry and stress over our ride back. to see you tensed, to watch you cater to everyone's need and to watch you lead all of us around..

there are no words which i could possibly use to describe how much i adore and love you for who you are.. i wish i knew how to but i simply cannot..all i can say is that, you're perfect. and i absolutely adore you.

not everything goes as planned. plans to switzerland might have to be cancelled after all. i'm upset i'm not going. or might not be going. i've to persuade my father. i'm willing to leave ervything behind. what else is there for me here?

i'm just giving up on everything now...i just need to...i don't know what i have to do. i don't know what i can do. i'm confused. i'm having so many fucking second thoughts. i need a shoulder to cry on. these stupid tears which have been falling since just now, is not stopping. fuck everything.

i'm amazed at just how you manage to predict my everything. how you are always there to make me laugh.

like i said. you never cease to amaze me.

you weren't like that when we were friends. but now, you've evolved so much. from someone who was uncaring and perhaps oblivious to the antics of a girl, you're now, a perfect gentleman. someone i've alwayz dreamed of. perhaps excluding the bad posture and the slacker qualities you exert. but that isn't the most important thing.

you're the total opposite of me. i'm the picky one. the perfectionist, intent on getting everything right to the last detail. whereas you..  i'm the so-called nerd one. i study to the core (almost) and i bother about my studies. you...you somehow just have the brain. everything you are, i'm not, and everything i am, you're not. perhaps opposites do attract.

you've been a darling. especially today. or maybe everyday. those things you do, i really appreciate. i do. and it all just makes me love you all the more.

if you hadn't been there for me today, i wonder what i'd do.

i'm glad for you.

..i love you..

 .i love you.

 i love you

today was almost perfect.i love you.